Is sarcasm ruining your relationship? Have you found yourself in a sarcastic relationship where there’s a cunning undercurrent of spite and bitterness? Have you ever wondered when sarcasm became the way you communicated with this person who you used to treat so lovingly? Have you tried to overcome the habit, but find the inertia around sarcasm too strong to stop?
Sarcasm drains every life force around it. My grandparent’s relationship was made of sarcastic spite and bitterness, including constant harsh judgments and blaming. Sarcasm creates behaviors such as making comments under the breath, repeating what the other says in a spiteful mimic, and slicing through the heart with harsh judgment by mocking.
The belief you hold when you are being sarcastic is an overall belief thatyour partner is not enough. It’s an irony that conveys contempt. A disease that sneaks in and infiltrates the entire space with ridicule is far from the loving kindness that two hearts in partnership are truly seeking. Sarcasm is a sign that you are not on love’s path. Moving away from sarcasm is a great way to get back on the path of claiming a life you love.
Try these 3 Feats to Overcome Sarcasm:
1. Name What’s Going On
When two people decide to notice and name the sarcastic patterns in their relationship, that allows for curiosity, awareness, and improvement. Naming sarcasm looks like this. “Wow. What happened to us? We are quite guarded and sarcastic. How about we don’t blame each other and take a good look at how sarcasm is affecting our relationship.”
Once you begin to name your sarcastic patterns, it becomes easier to notice when sarcasm rears its ugly head. Naming the sarcastic pattern is a great start to beating the habit.
2. Identify the details of the pattern
To begin to rid your relationship of sarcasm, both of you must be committed to changing the pattern. If you aren’t, nothing will change and you will waste your lives away in an unfulfilling relationship. Become the curious scientist and let your emotions have a rest as you begin the process of repatterining sarcasm.
Go on dates where you make it a point to identify each time the sarcastic pattern occurs. Don’t try to change it yet, just stop the pattern when it comes up. Do this for a week. Make a promise to each other that you both will do your best not to make the other person wrong. Your only job together is to practice recognizing the pattern together. Begin to notice the times of the day and circumstances where you find sarcasm spreading easily. Each time it shows up, take a light hearted approach to point it out.
3. Rewire to respect
Only after you’ve really shown a light on the pattern should you begin to try to change it. Start by slowly substituting another pattern that works for both of you. Remember, the opposite of sarcasm is approval, respect, and kindness. Make a choice to see each other as little kids with hopes and dreams, and begin accepting the imperfections in the other.
Take a look at how you are sarcastic to yourself. Notice how your limiting sarcastic beliefs begin with fears of not being enough. Begin to show the kindness you want, instead of the sarcasm that you will no longer tolerate. When you do this for the sake of love and connection, you are taking a stand for a more peaceful life and a happier relationship the next time around. You begin to live a life where smiles, laughter, and authenticity abound, instead of sadness, sneers and anger.
A fair trial will take about 3 months. You both must be committed to make the change. Keep overcoming sarcasm at the forefront of your priorities. If after 3 months, you can’t re-pattern, it’s time to take a good look at whether moving on is the next stage. You don’t want to sit in this poison for too long. Think of what it could do to your life force long term. If you’re single, read my comment below…
You don’t want your next relationship to be sarcastic, right? If you are getting over a breakup right now, this is a sacred time to review your relationship with sarcasm and begin to name, identify, and rewire the way the bad habit shows up in your life. What have your parents and grandparents modeled in regard to sarcasm? How do you want to improve your heritage and take a stand for kindness, openness, and connection now as your heart heals? I would love to help you eradicate sarcasm and begin claiming the life you love! Click Below to apply for a complimentary Breakup to Breakthrough Strategy Session.Your Special Offer for a Complimentary Breakup to Breakthrough Strategy Session